"The Church" - Derek Webb

I have come with one purpose
To capture for myself a bride
By my life she is lovely
By my death she’s justified

I have always been her husband
Though many lovers she has known
So with water I will wash her
And by my word alone

So when you hear the sound of water
You will know that you’re not alone

‘Cause I haven’t come only for you
But for my people to pursue
You cannot care for me with no regard for her
If you love me you will love the church

I have long pursued her
As a harlot and a whore
But she will feast upon me
She will drink and thirst no more

So when you taste my flesh and blood
You will know you’re not alone

There is none that can replace her
Though there are many who will try
And though some may be her bridesmaids
They can never be my bride

News Flash: This is Art!

Okay, so I’m working on a presentation about “What is Art?” I opened up this article to find this scary, little critter! …If anyone has anything to contribute to the discussion of what the heck ART is, please feel free to enlighten me! If this ugly thing is art, then it would seem that the options are limitless…there don’t seem to be any guidelines! I suppose this is the point when it comes to creative expressions – no rules.

Some New Understanding

I am sitting here trying to write a term paper about compulsive gambling. I don’t really know where to begin. I attended a Gambler’s Anonymous meeting last week for a class I’m taking; we’re studying addictive behaviour. I decided that since I am not in the frame of mind to write a formal paper, I will write an informal blog entry.

I judge people. When we sit around in our classroom and talk about compulsive gambling, I am thinking to myself, “Why can’t they just use some self control and QUIT? Why can’t they think of someone other than themselves? Come on! Get your act together!” After attending the G.A. meeting, hearing the stories, and talking with the people there, I have this new and more realistic view of things.

There are not simple answers to these problems; some people cannot just quit. Even though their spouses have left them, they’re $30 000 in debt, and they used the dog’s vet money in the slot machines, they keep slipping up.

These are mothers, fathers, daughters, sons…they are you and me. The meeting was held in a church basement; while they sat in a circle and shared all of these struggles, a worship team was practicing upstairs. It was an interesting contrast to be sitting with all of these “troubled” people, while just above us, a group of people who “had it all together” sang worship music.

The truth is that the group upstairs is no different from the group downstairs. There we all sat in this church…and God loves all of us – whether we stole money from work to pay off a loan shark, whether we had jealous thoughts about a classmate or came to worship practice and sang lyrics that we didn’t really mean.

And the reality of it is that perhaps the gamblers in the basement were the ones who should be commended – they’re not living a lie anymore. They’re saying, “I’m Mona and I’m a compulsive gambler. I have a sin problem and I need help.” So many of us, as Christians, tend to think that we’re better than that – that we’re all sorted out and we should go out and reform the world and help with everyone else’s difficulties. Of course we should serve and help in practical ways, but we need to do this with an extremely humble attitude – we’re screwed up too. We’re not better. We all have a sin problem and we all need to be saved us from that.

Our Most Adorable Nephew

Elias Christian Lewis Brown is very wee, yet he has the ability to bring such a huge amount of joy into life. He is in for quite a change in December when he will receive a new little brother. His bro will be named Phoenix, or as Eli prefers to call him: "Pee-kicks".

Married Life

Okay, a blurb about life as a married woman. I am learning so many things, meaning:
a) David is curious by nature and will research anything he doesn’t know about; then he’ll teach me about it…he is the most interesting person to live with. This curiosity is not restricted to looking things up on Wikipedia, it also means asking the lady at the deli counter why she cuts two pre-slice of meat before bagging that rest. We learn things about the world.
b) I am a selfish person. Wow! I don’t think I saw this as clearly as I have since being married. I think it’s been good to realize this, so that something can be done about it.

Other things…it feels so natural. I thought it would feel strange and new; it feels like this has how it’s always been. I love coming home from school on the train, in anticipation of being with David for an evening. Even if the evening consists of sitting at the kitchen table, each doing schoolwork. It’s nice to just BE with him.

He is patient and caring. Even when I’m being a bit irrational, he’ll listen to me and say what needs to be said. He encourages us to go for walks together when there’s been a bad day. He’s gentle and honest.

Hmmmm…it’s also been good to get involved in some activities together. We’re leading Sunday School music starting in October; our church is in the midst of a baby boom, so there are plenty of kiddies. We’re taking dance lessons – social ballroom. Last week we learned the waltz and the foxtrot. Now that is a fun time if there ever was one!

I think I’m able to understand God’s love better than I ever have been able to before (not that I’ll ever even come close to wrapping my head around it completely!) First, I often wonder why David loves me…I see him as this amazing man who could have chosen any girl and he chose me…I sometimes wonder if he could really love me…and he really does! In realizing this love he has for me, and the love I have for David, I want to be a woman that he’ll be proud of. I have this desire to be better than what I am. And I think, maybe, that’s how it is with God. After realizing this fantastic, unconditional love He has for us, we don’t want to let Him down; we want to be better people.

We’re going to Washington for the weekend. It’s my birthday present…we’re going to ride on the train from the movie “Benny and Joon”. I’ll post pictures of our adventure.

Much love!