Some New Understanding

I am sitting here trying to write a term paper about compulsive gambling. I don’t really know where to begin. I attended a Gambler’s Anonymous meeting last week for a class I’m taking; we’re studying addictive behaviour. I decided that since I am not in the frame of mind to write a formal paper, I will write an informal blog entry.

I judge people. When we sit around in our classroom and talk about compulsive gambling, I am thinking to myself, “Why can’t they just use some self control and QUIT? Why can’t they think of someone other than themselves? Come on! Get your act together!” After attending the G.A. meeting, hearing the stories, and talking with the people there, I have this new and more realistic view of things.

There are not simple answers to these problems; some people cannot just quit. Even though their spouses have left them, they’re $30 000 in debt, and they used the dog’s vet money in the slot machines, they keep slipping up.

These are mothers, fathers, daughters, sons…they are you and me. The meeting was held in a church basement; while they sat in a circle and shared all of these struggles, a worship team was practicing upstairs. It was an interesting contrast to be sitting with all of these “troubled” people, while just above us, a group of people who “had it all together” sang worship music.

The truth is that the group upstairs is no different from the group downstairs. There we all sat in this church…and God loves all of us – whether we stole money from work to pay off a loan shark, whether we had jealous thoughts about a classmate or came to worship practice and sang lyrics that we didn’t really mean.

And the reality of it is that perhaps the gamblers in the basement were the ones who should be commended – they’re not living a lie anymore. They’re saying, “I’m Mona and I’m a compulsive gambler. I have a sin problem and I need help.” So many of us, as Christians, tend to think that we’re better than that – that we’re all sorted out and we should go out and reform the world and help with everyone else’s difficulties. Of course we should serve and help in practical ways, but we need to do this with an extremely humble attitude – we’re screwed up too. We’re not better. We all have a sin problem and we all need to be saved us from that.