Coping with the Idea of Death

I went to see the Body Worlds exhibit today – a display of real human bodies, with the skin removed. It was quite amazing. I’ve already been feeling really sad about the fact that we all have to die. I am really enjoying life right now. I love each individual moment and am looking forward to exciting things in the future. I am discovering excellent things in myself – things that I am really good at, and would like to pursue further…interior decorating, mostly. I love making nice places to live in. I love home.

I am married to David. He is my love. I could not imagine loving anyone more than I love him. And I could not imagine a bigger love than the one I have for him.

I love God. But that is still a strange concept to me. I am trying to get to know Him better. I feel unworthy sometimes. I feel almost embarrassed to pray – I am learning, a little bit, that God is huge and powerful and way beyond whatever my mind could begin to comprehend. Why should anything I say be worthy of his listening? He loves me. I believe that but can’t grasp it. I can understand my love for David better. We’re equals. We’re on par with each other. But a relationship with God is...different than that. Obviously.

So I get sad about one day saying goodbye to David and to life on earth. I believe that David and I are going to heaven. And I am trusting that it is even better there than it is here. That is what I read. But I don’t understand it. Will I get to love David? Will he get to love me, too? Will I get to decorate? Will there be spring blooms? Autumn leaves? I hope so.

How do people who don’t know Jesus and don’t have hope for heaven cope with the concept of death? How can they get through each day? What is the point for them? How do they deal with the death of people they love?

I get twinges of sickness when I remember that we’re all going to die. I am confronted with it, almost on a weekly basis, at work. But then I feel a wave of hope when I think that there is something better coming. And things will become more clear.